99 Problems And A Wedding Vendor Ain’t One.

Dear #JustEngaged Couples,

We apologize in advance.

Here comes Valentine’s Day. Did you know he/she was going to ask for your “forever yes”? Was it awkward in a cute kinda way? Did he/she make it short and sweet or was it almost as if they have been writing this for months? Either way, let us assume you said “Yes!” and assume you opened up that smart phone and posted a glamorous photo of the ring and maybe even the two of you as well. You hashtagged the crap out of that photo. Random tags like #justengaged #justengayged #gettingmarried #isaidyes #forevertogether along with some cute personal hashtags. You sent some text messages and watched those “Likes” and IG “Hearts” get filled with congratulations from family and friends. BTW, did you call the family first or IG and Snapchat that first? Nobody will know but we bet some of you did 😉

Now comes the fun part. The glisten in your eyes as you look at your infallible partner (infallible at least for the time being) thinking of plans, where, when, how, who, “Holy shit I’m Engaged” and all the fun going on for the next few weeks like your very own parade in NYC! Here comes some advice. Just a touch but its important. Go to Gmail. Create an email that is brand new and use it for everything Wedding. You can make it ourwedding2017@gmail.com or whatever you want but do it. Speaking on behalf of my fellow Wedding vendors, I can tell you some of us, not all of us but definitely some of us are going to get your information and email you like the cure is in it. We are going to get that email. And some of us are going to email you more often than mom or dad would tell you to “clean up your room”. Not only are some of us going to do that. But some of us are going to do that for the rest of your life. Yes. Really. Like Forever.

Nearly 5 years ago we played Bride. Sort of. We signed up for a few websites within the Wedding industry, magazine websites, etc just so we could experience what Couples receive from vendors and most definitely also to creep on what some of them are doing. We were a  blushing bride-to-be, 26 years of age and having our reception at a popular Reception Hall in New Jersey. The date was set to marry our love in 2015. And then we waited.

Fast Forward 2 Weeks.
Visit Gmail.
Open Gmail.
Get Popcorn.

Congratulations. You’re Engaged. Call Trump and Build A Wall.
We opened up our emails and had over 500 emails within 2 weeks. 500. Five Hundy. Less than 501. More than 499.

So we did what any business owner does when creeping on their industry Bride-To-Be does.
We filtered them so they were sorted by the name of the email address. About 100 or so emails were from about 40 or so companies. Ok an email a week or so from each of them. Totally acceptable. The remaining 400 or so emails were from 12 companies. Twelve. A Dozen. As in they had their own page of emails within Gmail. You know when you scroll from page to page but they had their own page. That last thing we were going to do was hit “View All Emails”. Google’s Gmail is powerful but event then we thought they may hit the wall if we did this.

Happy Engaged Couples, we are all for marketing to attain you as a client. We are in business, we provide a service and most of us do it well; but we apologize. We apologize for the some of us that apparently are bored and sending out blanket spam emails with zero attention to detail. Emails that had our  first name as an input field similar to |First Name| |Last Name| to those extras special emails that were CC’ed to over 200 Couples as if they were writing their friends and family about some major milestone or photos of their pets. BTW, pet photos are always welcomed here. With that said, the Wedding Industry has many wonderful, talented and downright great companies but well some of us not so much.

How To Build That Wall
Step 1. Visit Gmail and create that email.
Step 2. Go to Google Voice and get a free local phone number so that you can receive text messages from vendors who attain your phone number. It will send you an email alert (See Step 1) when you receive a text message.
Step 3. Print Labels with your info so you can easily provide them to vendors at expos
Step 4. Call or Email Us….or we just may email you. Mwahahahaha
Step 5. Get Married

Sincerely,
Us – Most definitely not some of us

PS
As of this date, Feb 15 2016, a full year after our “so called” wedding date we maintain a steady flow of never having “Inbox Zero” so if you need a discount on a Photo Booth, just let us know. We have about 300 for you.

Watch An Episode of The Wedding Unboxer!

Sofia + Abbie Article Comments

2017-09-29T04:13:35+00:00 February 15th, 2016|